Friday

debauchery, my old friend [hijinks]


this chat transcript was sent to me in an email at 11:15 AM yesterday from one of the participants. hope you can appreciate the drunk-centricities (bazaar crew, etc.).

10:44 AM (A): om gosh lover
om gosh
where do i begin???
10:45 AM i'm sooooooo drunk right now
l slept for an hour
was really late to work
partied like a fucking rock star last night
with a bazaar crew
10:46 AM or townie pool players
hooked up with this random hottie from west virginia that lives in williamsburg
(B): weird!
oh man
me: drank from like 9 to 9am
10:47 AM saw the sun come up on a billyburg roof top
smoked a bit more than cigarettes
made friends with a guy that did 5 years in sing sing
that
wants to cook for me
haha
10:48 AM om gosh you would have LOVED it
(B): um what??
(A): dude is jamaican
has like a million dollars stored in bags around the city
has recovered most of it
like a fuckin pirate's burried treasure!!!!! no kidding
10:49 AM like the count of monte cristo!
10:50 AM has a scar on his jaw from where he was stabbed with a tooth brush in his first gang fight in prison
that went through his jaw
(B): oh god
okay
you're insane
10:51 AM (A): and cut out one of his back molars
then in his second gang fight he had his chest slashed
nice scar
10:52 AM and then his third and final fight his left lung was pierced
after that they respected him and left him alone ;)
he has his only clothing line
and used to provide drugs for like
every fucking music group you can think of that was popular in the 90's
10:53 AM (B): color me badd?
(A): his gf waited for him to get out of
hahaha
(B): please say new kids on the block
(A): prison and it's insane
haha
i didn't ask him that
dude was waaaaaaay too legit for my own good
10:54 AM (B): so how did you meet these people?
10:55 AM (A): um...
went to moonshine
the WV hottie was sitting at the bar alone
hit it off with her
it'
was her bff's bday
so she invited me to tag along
10:56 AM ended up going to like...4 or 5 dif bars
good convo
etc
we ened up making out in a bed with the bday girl passed out next to us!!!!
haha
effing classic
10:57 AM she's a singer and a nanny and had to be up by 8 and at nanny stuff by 9
we woke up at 930
and were like FUCK!
staying at some strange apt in the burg
roof top was insane
great view of midtown
with like 20 peeps
10:58 AM and weed
and smokes
and a dog running around
and my god i wish you could have seen some of the outfits on these people
(B): did you smoke crack right now? you're going a mile a minute?
!
(A): valuer jump suits with ed harvey hats and sun glasses
um
i don't think so???
10:59 AM (B): awesome
(A): just adrenaline and an americano :0
and no sleep
ok
i'm done now
haha
(B): no
tell me more
I don't mind
11:00 AM (A): i'm just hoping no one comes close enough to me to realize i'
m
effing wasted as all hell
like
holy shit
wasted
like i was drinking two hours ago
wasted
11:01 AM (B): that's insane!
(A): i feel like i should go throw up in the bathroom
sooo ghetto
11:02 AM so i'm supposed to see the chick again tonight
her bro plays in a band that is main stage at joes pub tonight
11:03 AM and apparently she's got an agent and is a really good singer
backup or something
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
that makes it even more perfect, right?
soo deceiving
i mean
looks like a cross between
11:09 AM kelly rippa
11:10 AM (B): and who?
11:12 AM (A): and evangelline lilly from lost
11:13 AM (B): oh hot
(A): right?